Too many people go through life searching for their oasis and yet never find it. Some are seeking to douse their anger or to wash away their guilt. Others are longing for a place of rest from the addiction or obsession constantly burning within them. Many have lost hope. Are some people simply wired this way? Is there no way out?
Amelia Mathee has dealt with thousands of people thirsting for answers. Her counseling approach incorporates both her knowledge in the fields of psychology and neuroscience as well as her biblical understanding—this is where Scripture meets science. Even though you may be "wired" one way, you can begin the journey to rewire your brain and find that oasis after all.
Maybe you're feeling alone in the desert and don't know which way to turn. This is your opportunity to choose a new life for yourself. "This is what I do," says Amelia. "I meet people in their desert, and I help them find their way out."
CBT assumes that unproductive or unhelpful thinking causes unproductive behavior or undesired negative emotions. Emotions don’t come out of nowhere, they don’t stand isolated. Emotions are responses to our thoughts.
CBT teaches individuals to identify, challenge, and replace maladaptive thoughts and distorted thinking styles with healthy thoughts and behaviors.
CBT has been shown effective in the treating of:
An emotion is hard to change, therefore CBT intervenes in changing your thoughts around the situation which gave rise to the emotion.
Core beliefs are a person’s most central ideas about themselves, others, and the world. These beliefs act like a lens through which every situation and life experience is seen. Because of this, people with different core beliefs might be in the same situation, yet think, feel, and behave very differently.
To simplify this, core beliefs are like sunglasses. If they are rose tinted, everything you see will be rose tinted. What if they are scratched? Chances are that you might notice them in the very beginning, but your eyes will adjust to the scratches and after some time you won’t even see them. Your brain is like the lens, and the scratch is the core belief. Harmful core beliefs lead to negative thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, whereas rational core beliefs lead to balanced reactions. They shape our reality and modify our thinking and our behavior. In fact, nothing matters more than our core beliefs.
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) has become the leading treatment for anxiety, and with good reason. CBT works by identifying and addressing how a person's thoughts and behaviors interact to create anxiety. An emotion like anxiety is very hard to change, so you need to target the thought that leads to the undesired emotion.
Amy is a beautiful teenager who is diagnosed with Bipolar and suffers from depression and anxiety. She does self-harm, and says that is the only way she can ‘let go”. She would get physically sick many times, and she was always tired. I did not understand what to do. She was seeing a psychiatrist and was on medication, but her body still suffered.
It made me wonder ... what if the scientists are right? According to medical research, “Trauma symptoms are not caused by the external event. They develop when excessive energy is not discharged from the body.” Have you ever witnessed when an antelope is chased by a predator, and the chase is unsuccessful? What is the first thing the antelope will do? He will shake himself in order to get rid of excessive energy. Shaking is the natural way to release tension and return the body to its normal homeostasis. It is a primal impulse to a stressful situation.
Maybe shaking is what we are supposed to do, but we are taught to take it, smile, hold back our tears, and “just be brave”. Sadly this demeanour will trap stress in our bodies, and it will affect every part of our being. When something traumatic happens to us, we bottle it up inside, and because we are not wired like that, we ‘self destruct’. Animals seem to be able to dissipate stress, but we, on the other hand, have lost our ability to recalibrate our nervous system. When we sense a threat, the body releases huge amounts of stress hormones to help us overcome the danger. This is commonly known as the flight-fight response. It kicks in, and we literally shake with fear.I’ve started doing combined body therapy with Amy, and now she is a new person. She no longer has the urge to hurt herself, because the culprit (the body in this case) started to heal.
Just like a virus on a computer, so will unprocessed trauma create havoc in your body. It will cause your mental and physical processes to malfunction and go haywire. Whether we want to believe it or not, it’s not just the brain which holds onto our trauma, our body’s cells leave an imprint of a traumatic event, also.
I started having sessions with Amelia during a time where I was on a suicide path. Her gentle approach absolutely saved my life. She listens without any judgement. During sessions with her, she helped me to look at things and situations differently. When the same darkness came over me, I immediately knew where to go. God's forgiveness, peace and love shines through her. Amelia has a gift and that gift absolutely saved my life.
Izzy - Cape Town, South Africa
I approached Amelia Mathee last spring to help coach me through a very stressful school year and to help coach me so I could balance my work life and personal life. Amelia coaches with Cognitive Behavior Therapy. Through different strategies, she has taught me how not to sweat the small stuff, how not to be offended by others, how to usher in the presence of the Lord in my work and how to challenge and bust negative thinking. Amelia thank you for pouring your coaching expertise on me. I intend to use this in my day to day life and it has helped me cope through this COVID season. Thank you dear sister, from the bottom of my heart. Sincerely, Anna-Marie Chainus (K-8 certified ELL teacher and mother of an energetic 8-year old)
Anna-Marie - Seatlle, USA
After only 2 sessions my view of myself and others has changed. Coming to the realization that I'm full of negative thoughts and the power they have in my relationships and life was staggering. That was the first step for me was the realization and the consciousness of my thoughts. These negative responses to people had placed a dark cloud over my life, mainly with my relationships with family. Having a vision of Jesus inside of people helped my vision of myself and others. Mindset has changed!! My heart softened, and my thoughts are becoming more loving. It takes work to stop those fire breathing negative beasts ( thoughts). Thank you dear Amelia for your compassion, and your non judging words of truth that have washed over me. I love how you put Jesus into these teachings, He works through and in us. He is in me, now let him shine through me! The Light of Love...words can't explain enough the new vision I have. Thank you precious sister in Christ- This has healed my heart and mind.
Anne - Iowa, USA
